Never ending journey

I don’t believe a relationship can be both happy and stagnant for long, yet the flip side of that used to be quite daunting.Think about it. Nothing brings the same level of excitement as a new element to a scene. But does that mean you have to continue upping the ante?

When we first began our journey, some fifteen years or so ago, we had clearly defined boundaries. Yet with the passage of time, those boundaries have expanded. Early on, they changed at a pretty rapid pace. Honestly, I was worried where our path would take us.

My husband and I spoke often about it. He reassured me at every turn that we would never do anything that I didn’t agree to, far in advance.  One of our hard and fast rules was I  couldn’t change my limits mid scene. He demanded I have a clear head when I set the boundaries. He knew what felt good in the moment, might have traumatic consequences for me the next day.

While I appreciated his words of solace, it didn’t completely alleviate my concern. I knew he would never go against my wishes. The problem was, I worried what it would take to keep the euphoria coming. How could we continue to explore and not, eventually, grenade even our hardest limits into oblivion?

Turns out my husband was smarter than I was. He knew our core values would never change and they haven’t – even though we still try new things all the time. In spite of the fact that we’ve been on this path for more years than I care to count, we still discover a new facets to our scenes.

Just recently, we stumbled upon a style of play I never dreamed would push my buttons. In truth, I might have had an inkling a while back, but I didn’t recognize it for what it was. Until I was secure in the knowledge that our path wouldn’t lead in certain directions, I think I refused to acknowledge it. (There are a few types of play that I never want to engage in. I won’t mention them here; I don’t want to offend anyone. My limits need not match anyone elses. Just because something is off limits for me, doesn’t make it bad for others to engage in. My preferences are simply different from theirs.)

We’ve finally reached a point, where I no longer worry about the destination and I’m just thoroughly enjoying the ride.

What Does Love Look Like To You?

My husband is a total gear-head. If you cut him he’s more likely to bleed motor oil than blood. He loves American Muscle. Large cubic inch V-8s, lots of torque, two doors, ostentatious colors and loud stripes, get his heart pumping.

Fast, sleek, sporty, closed-bow boats do it for him too.

If he doesn’t have grease or paint under his fingernails, he just isn’t happy. Currently, he owns one car that is officially done, one he’s working on and one project waiting its turn in the wings. To say he stays busy would be an understatement.

When the kids were at home, he had to curb his tastes to fit within the family constraints. Our family ride was a limited edition, sporty, four door truck. Not so bad, right? Well, it almost killed him. The only thing that made it tolerable was the hemi and cool go-mango paint. Our boat was a compromise too. He called it a ‘soccer mom boat’ and there was some truth to that. It had a large sun lounge that we could snuggle on, a stow and go table we could use as a family, and a walk-through, open bow. It was convenient. And he hated it.

After our kids had graduated college and moved on with their life, my husband ran across his dream boat while surfing the internet one day. It was a smidgen expensive, but knowing we could easily sell the ‘soccer mom boat’ and recoup most the money – we sprang for it. I wish you could have seen the smile on his face as we pulled that rundown speed boat into the drive.

He spent that entire off season reconditioning the boat. He completely restored both the interior and exterior. It was drop dead gorgeous. We used it frequently that summer. One evening while we were enjoying a sunset out on the lake, he asked me what I thought of the boat. I told him it was beautiful and that he had out-done himself.

After spending thirty plus years with me, he knew I was hedging. Being the dominant that he is, he didn’t let my half answer ride. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. He had turned an old rundown boat into a show-piece. It was a great boat if all you wanted to do was cruise the lake and ski. If you wanted to snuggle, you were out of luck though. Eventually, I told him so.

That winter he told me we were selling the boat. I felt horrible. This was his dream boat, the one he’d drooled over as a teen. He’d worked his butt off restoring it and now he wanted to sell it. I told him I wasn’t comfortable with that decision and I really thought he would come to regret it. They are fairly rare and it wouldn’t be possible for him to just buy another. In our household, decisions are made by him. He listens to my input, but ultimately, it’s his decision. All I could do was sit back and wait. And hope.

A few weeks went by before we discussed it again. He told me he’d been thinking about what I said and he’d come up with a compromise. The boat was actually longer than our previous boat, but the cabin design made it feel cramped. His plan was to completely redesign the cabin area. He wanted to literally take a saw and cut away a portion of the aft-deck to enlarge the space. With the added room, he would be able to duplicate the wrap around seating and sun lounge area of our previous boat.

The project he was proposing was huge. All the work he’d previously done on the upholstery would be for nothing. He’d have to re-engineer the rear seating area, fabricate and re-gelcoat a significant portion of the rear area of the boat – all because I missed snuggling with him.

What does love look like to me? It looks like my husband spending hour after hour working to make his dream boat, our dream boat. It looks like my husband putting his car projects on hold while he spends months making sure our alone time on the lake is as special as it can be.

I asked my husband what love looked like to him. His answer was immediate – my woman having faith and confidence in me.

What does love look like to you?

Right on!

discovered

His to Own is an All Romance Bestseller.

https://www.allromanceebooks.com/product-histoown-1857237-144.html

HisToOwn_MSR

After escaping a controlling and abusive husband, Angela has vowed never to date or marry again. She joins Cat Tails, a BDSM club that seems like the perfect place to explore her submissive urges in a controlled environment without expectations of a relationship. She’s instantly attracted to a Dom named Brett, but he’s looking for love and marriage. Since she’s sworn off both, she is reluctant to play with him at the club.
Brett is immediately drawn to Angela but she doesn’t seem to know he exists. When she gets into trouble with an errant Dom, Brett’s protective impulse kicks in. The more he learns about her past, the more he is determined to be her future. He knows it will take time and a masterful touch to break through her barriers and make her his forever.
Reader Advisory: This story has graphic sexual language and scenes—no closed bedroom doors (or other rooms) here!

Signed, sealed and delivered

Bondage Seduction is completed. The final edits are done and it was shipped off to the publisher for the final time this afternoon. I can’t believe how good it feels to have that completed. I don’t know why I let edits freak me out so much, but I fully admit I do.

Bondage Seduction will be the fourth in the Desired Discipline series. I joke that it is pretty much non-stop sex and there is some truth in that statement. Ted was a tough character. He really didn’t want to share his story with me, but he simply couldn’t resist Meri.

I’m about halfway finished with His To Own. I’ve been stalled for a day or two. For some odd reason, I can’t seem to work through a particular sex scene. It just isn’t flowing for me. Of course, life has thrown me a few curves here lately, but I think the worst has passed (cross my fingers and toes).

Tonight is a dinner celebration and family time. My little girl turned twenty-four today. Yikes, that’s hard to believe. I still picture her as a cute little toddler offering to share her slobbery, birthday cupcake and with wide, brilliant eyes announcing that the candle was h-o-t. Funny, how I can’t remember where I put my glasses, but that memory is still fresh and strong.

Tomorrow is booked with an odd assortment of events, but Thursday I’m kicking some serious butt on His To Own. Alexa is about to have her world turned upside down by one hot and domineering Top.

Release dates for Bondage Seduction

Master Ted tried to keep it purely sexual. He said he didn’t want a relationship, but Meri had other plans…

Even in a room full of friends, Ted often feels alone. As the black sheep of the family, he’s never measured up to the expectations of others so he’s stopped trying. Expecting to and okay with, spending the rest of his life alone, he’s thrown himself into his business. He spends his days managing the sex toy division of DiscipliNation and his evenings in the kink club.

Meri is a home grown girl and plans to stay that way. While she tries to please those around her, she refuses to be pressured into anything she doesn’t want to do. After an ego devastating divorce, she discovers a passion for BDSM. She’s ready to start again.

Although fireworks erupt at their very first meeting, Ted knows better than to give his heart to an overachiever like Meri. He valiantly tries to keep his distance, but her allure goes deeper than a purely sexual attraction. Meri ignites his passion and yet in her company he experiences a peace he’s never enjoyed before.

Ted sets Meri’s panties on fire until he orders her to stop wearing them. Meri falls hard and fast for the tall, dark Dom.  He tells her up front that a relationship isn’t part of his plans, but Meri has her own agenda.

Respect

Last night, my husband and I went to a concert. We had the great privilege to meet the artist and speak with him for a bit. Being a writer, I long ago came to grips with the fact that I prefer to live in my head. I am not an outgoing people person. If my husband hadn’t been there with me, I would never have consented to meet the singer.

The artist is a total heart throb and in many ways a man-whore. He knows he’s sexy and he uses it to sell his albums. I don’t blame him. It works and he would probably agree with the description. In all honesty, he seemed like a very nice man.

The part of the evening that I found most notable was in watching the women attending the event. Most were accompanied by their husbands and yet as soon as the man entered the room, their TOTAL attention was on the artist. It was as if their significant other didn’t exist. In my opinion, their behavior showed a complete lack of respect toward their mate.

In the D/s stories I write, that type of conduct would never be condoned. In my own relationship, I couldn’t fathom ignoring my husband. Respect isn’t something that is only shown when it is convenient. He is the most important person in my life. It’s his smile that warms my heart, his arms I want wrapped around me, and his attention I value more than any other.

The heroes in my books are good men. I would never pair them with a heroine who would toss him aside if a rich and famous man showed them interest.

Seriously ladies, that type of behavior isn’t even worthy of discipline. It’s worthy of a boot, on your butt, through an open doorway.