Smokin’ Hot

The days are heating up. Recently, we hit 113. In that kind of heat it’s hard to even breathe. You get into a car that’s been baking in the sun and it’s like a blast furnace. Everything you touch is scalding hot. The steering wheel, the gear shift, the seat belt, are so unbearable some people joke they should drive with oven mitts.

That’s what I think of when I hear the term ‘smokin’ hot’.

For whatever reason, I don’t equate that term with a person or sex. Although good sex, much like insufferable heat, can make breathing labored. Have you ever wondered how we’ve come to associate certain terms with a person’s looks or actions?

As cute as a bug’s ear…what bug has cute ears? None that I’ve ever seen – not that I’ve spent much time looking at bugs.

Another one that baffles me is the sex was’ to die for’. I rather doubt sex is a high priority if you’re dead.

Easy as pie…dumb as dirt…bright as a hooty owl – seriously? Who comes up with these? And why would anyone say such a silly thing?

(Embarrassed and sheepishly (whatever that means) if asked, I’d have to raise my hand) Yes, I’ve used them. When in Rome and all that…not that I’ve ever been to Rome. My only excuse is when put on the spot…I find it hard to stay ‘calm as fuck’ and will often blurt out the first thing that comes to mind.

And in closing, if you stay calm while fucking – please don’t read my books. You don’t want to ‘bite off more than you could chew’.

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